The Loneliness Pandemic

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I'm reminded of the book by John Donne - No Man Is an Island.

There are 3.8 billion smartphone users worldwide, Facebook connects more than 60% of the world, and yet, loneliness is on the rise. Irony much?

Dr. Vivek Murthy, former Surgeon General of the United States, wrote that loneliness and weak social connections are associated with a reduction in lifespan similar to that caused by smoking 15 cigarettes a day. He’s a chap who knows what he’s talking about since he has just been appointed co-chair of the United States Covid-19 task force!

Loneliness is about the absence of connection, not the absence of people. The problem is that the presence of people presumes connection which is clearly not the case. Chief amongst the many ironies of social media is that we are available 24/7 for engagements yet research indicates that loneliness is an epidemic and the need for face-to-face connection is not reduced by the number of "virtual friends" or followers you have online (Lim, 2018).

Once upon a time – where all heart-warming stories begin – people would work hard to escape loneliness; they would actually get out of the house and seek out somebody to bug and they would even find people to. Phones were a tad bulky to be found in pockets and we're not even remotely deemed to be a loneliness buster. We used to have to make friendships and connect with our neighbours because we needed their support in practical ways. Now it’s easier to order a packet of sugar from Amazon than to knock on a neighbour’s door and ask. This is a very lonely place to be.

Now is a time when hanging around with friends also means hanging around with those friends who they are hanging around with on their phones as they hang around with you. You just happen to be the physical part of their extended friend network, at that moment in time. We are also in a time when we might not be sure whether we are lonely since there’s always something that our phones can do for us. Even if we are not chatting or indulging in some basic glorified voyeurism on Instagram. To realize that we are lonely is, in itself, a boon as our devices are our friends and if there are friends around, how can you be lonely?

Social media can be connecting but not necessarily in a meaningful or real way. Our Instagram stories are like a lukewarm bath — not cold enough to get out of just yet, but not hot enough to be actually good. And when we finally shake ourselves free, we find that we’ve – at least most of us – just wasted a chunk of time.

While technology has allowed us means of social connection that would have not been possible before, we spread ourselves too thin. It also slowly ruins the quality of social interaction that we all need as human beings. This is not a rant against tech; I’m only highlighting that when a person's main source of connection is through online technology, loneliness can become a significant factor sooner than later.